It's Your Wedding Day: Relax & Celebrate!

Congratulations! All your efforts in wedding planning have paid off and the big day has finally arrived!

Remember to EAT {even if you are so nervous / excited that you don't think you can}, and don't sweat the small things {like if you see a flower out of place}, the day goes by so quickly, you want to make sure that you really are in the moment and enjoying yourself, not worrying about a thing. Let your vendors worry about the details!



{courtesy of Martha Stewart Weddings}


This post was originally published on July 4th, 2009

What Do I Love?

I was recently interviewed for a blog that features Successful Female Entrepreneur's Under 30 ... in a few months I won't be applicable for this, so I thought I'd better answer them quickly!

One of the questions resonated with me: "What part of my job do I love?" I loved this question because it gave me the opportunity to share my thoughts on what part of the wedding planning experience that I love and it'll surprise you, while I love the planning aspect, the creative aspect and the over-organized aspect, my true love of this industry comes on the wedding day itself. I love seeing all the hard work that my couples and I have put into planning their wedding day, come to life. I love to see a set reception area just before guests arrive, knowing that each element of the design are choices that are reflective of this newly minted married couple. I love seeing my couple's recess down the aisle knowing that they have this new life to begin together. I love being told Thank You at the end of an awesome wedding. So while I love the wedding day, I love more what the wedding day represents: the joining of two souls together and the knowledge that I helped to shape their day. To me, that is incredibly meaningful.

And as an added bonus, coordinating a wedding allows me to reflect back on my own wedding day: the extreme excitement I had almost two years ago when I got to say I do to my best friend.

What do you love about your job?

Your Wedding Ceremony Is Not An Afterthought

This post has been brewing in my head for a few weeks now. I've had numerous conversations with other wedding industry folks and even guests at weddings about this and I thought I should write down my thoughts.

It seems like more and more couples are forgetting about what is truly important on their wedding day. There is so much time and effort put into pulling inspiration boards from 1000 blogs to make sure that the table scape is just so, or making sure that there is an appropriate amount of alcohol at the wedding or that the welcome bags are just that much 'better' than so and so's were at their wedding; this mentality just breaks my heart. Couples are losing sight of the most fundamental aspect of the wedding day: the wedding ceremony. Let me remind you: without the ceremony, you wouldn't be having this over the top, lavish and expensive party.

Your wedding ceremony should be your number one priority on your wedding day. Spend time making sure that every element of your ceremony is truly reflective of the life that you are going to create together. Remember that the vows you declare to each other are important, they have vast meaning. Your pre-marital counselling is hugely important. Don't just shrug it off and not take it seriously. By getting married, you are making one of the biggest commitments of your life: this isn't an aspect of the wedding day where you should spend only 30 minutes thinking about. All too often I come across couples who are so pre-occupied by the reception that they've lost sight of what is actually important: their verbal commitment to each other for forever.

Please spend some time on your ceremony. The rest of the wedding day: cocktail hour, reception, after party is all gravy. Your wedding ceremony is the reason that you are having this fabulous celebration, otherwise you are really missing the point of the marriage and the wedding day.

Assistants Perspective: Two Weeks Before The Wedding Day

I am a packing procrastinator, the person that is still be packing moments before I have to leave for the airport. Don’t do this on your wedding day! You want to be relaxed and know that you have double and triple checked that you have everything you need for the big day. By packing ahead of time you will have it out of the way and be able to enjoy those last few days as a bride.

For your Wedding Day:
Organize all the items you need for your ceremony and reception and label them. This way the venue, wedding planner, friend, or even you don’t have to shuffle through the items and try to figure out what programs go into what basket. Have a copy of your vows and readings printed on index cards just in case someone forgets them.

Ask your venue if you can drop off all reception items off the day before, items such as Menus, favors, escort cards, signage, cake knife, etc.

Gather your dress, undergarments, shoes, jewelry, and headpiece and put them all together in a closet for safekeeping so the morning of it will all be in one place, ready to be worn!

Wedding Day Emergency Kit:
Prepare an “emergency” bag with essentials you may need. Pack items like an extra pair of shoes, make up bag, double sided tape, safety pins, breath mints, tissues, small first aid kit, deodorant, stain remover wipes, snacks, medications, if you are curling your hair, pack a curling iron in case you hair needs a little touch up.

Honeymoon:
We are leaving the morning after our wedding for our honeymoon which means everything must be ready to go! Even if you aren’t leaving right away it is important to at least create a packing list and throw a few of the essential items you know you need to take into an open suitcase. Make sure you have all the medications you need, travel documents, and cosmetics. You may think that you can pick something up at the local drugstore, but keep in mind the location you are visiting, the brands and items may differ from here.

Happy Packing!

Venue Visit: Wolffer Estate Vineyards

One of the perks of being a wedding planner is that you get to visit beautiful places that couples can get married, which isn't a bad perk at all! A week ago, Lisa Barr, a very dear friend invited me to spend an afternoon at Wolffer Estate out in Sagaponack {The Hamptons}, wine tasting, touring the vineyard and learning about the weddings that the vineyard puts on. Um, Lisa, darling, you had me at wine.

The vineyard has a lovely Tuscan feel to it, its architecture is very rich and Mediterranean. Wedding Ceremonies take place out amongst the vines and grapes at a sweet Gazebo. Dinner is served alfresco on a large porch. Dancing takes place in the Tasting Room. The space has a lovely relaxed feel to it, you can easily forget that you're only a two hour drive from Manhattan! {Sans traffic of course}.

If you are looking for a destination wedding spot that's close to home, check out Wolffer Estate Vineyards ~ you'll really feel like you've take a quick trip to Italy! They offer wedding packages and have a venue fee, and can accommodate all faiths. They have room for 175 people.


{via NY Post}


{via Cappy Hotchkiss}

And some celebrity signed wine barrels:

{via Lisa Barr}


{via Lisa Barr}

To Rehearse or Not To Rehearse?

First, before anything gets written here, let's just mention that today is National Ice Cream Sandwich day. Go and eat one, its your civic duty!

Since I am a planner by nature, I am inclined to rehearse or at least do a walk through of most major milestones in my life. My inner perfectionist can't rest if I don't have a chance to practice. But, others prefer to just be organized and "wing it" so to speak.

So where does yours wedding fall on that spectrum? Are you definitely having a rehearsal so that everything runs smoothly with no surprises during your ceremony? Or are you sure that by telling people what to do, they will just do it and it will be smooth?

In my experience, the latter almost never happens since your words inevitably always get lost in translation from your lips to someone's ears. When you say move to the left of the officiant, they hear go stand in front of the officiant. Its uncanny, but every wedding I've done that doesn't have a rehearsal prior to the ceremony, things have not gone smoothly.

So here are some pros / cons to doing a rehearsal:

Pros: Not a guarantee for perfection, but pretty close. At least your bridal party will have a vague idea of what the space looks like and where they should go. Everyone will feel a bit more comfortable about the ceremony and what will be happening. If you make a 'mistake' during the rehearsal, it can be corrected - not so much during the ceremony itself.

Cons: Takes time. True, the rehearsal can take ages if people are late or the officiant is long winded or the bridal party is huge. Its a wedding ceremony, almost every single person you've ever met has been to one, so they get it, right? We're easy going people, we don't care what happens during the ceremony - its natural.

For all the cons, here's what a wedding planner will tell you: if you think you won't get upset that your bridesmaids all sat down when they were supposed to stand or that the groomsmen were in the wrong order - um, yes, you will. Those mistakes will be a facet of your wedding day that will stay with you. And for every wedding that your bridal party or ceremony participants have attended or been in - this is YOUR wedding ceremony. It may be .0000001% different to what everyone else has been to and that minute difference can mean the difference between a smooth ceremony and a not so smooth one. So please, build a rehearsal into your wedding weekend.

Are you planning or not planning on doing a rehearsal? What are your thoughts?

Favorite Find at The National Stationery Show: Drink Me Tags

Ever been invited to a dinner party and at the last minute you remember you need a gift? You grab a bottle of wine and head for your friends house - wouldn't your last minute gift be better presented if it had a delightful tag affixed to it that was both witty and memorable? Enter Drink Me Tags, the perfect gift tag for your wine bottle. These cleverly designed tags are simple yet pack a bit punch. I met Sara Rossi, one part of the Drink Me Tags duo {her mother, Val, is the other part} at NSS and immediately thought of how many I could purchase before my husband began to think that I was hoarding them. Sara mentioned how they saw a need for a sweet way to 'dress up a wine bottle' and thus Drink Me Tags were born. The sayings are hilarious "drinks well with others" "un-wine-ding" and "put a cork in it" are just a sampling. They can even customize the tags {perfect for a wedding or shower} and they have a fabulous holiday collection as well.

Check out Drink Me Tags and make sure no bottle of wine leaves the house 'undressed'!

Hiring a Wedding Planner {Part 1}

As a wedding planner and a wedding blogger, my main goal is to educate engaged couples about wedding planning. To educate them on all the in's and out's of weddings and all the nuances of planning them. It's also a slightly selfish goal, because an educated bride and groom makes the wedding planning process go more smoothly!

For the next few weeks {on Wednesdays}, the posts are going to be focused on hiring a wedding planner: the nitty gritty of the how / why / when / what to expect / how to act ... the everything. We're going in depth on this topic and I hope that we'll all be a little bit more educated at the end of it.

So, first things first. What is a wedding planner and why do you think you need one?

A wedding planner {aka wedding coordinator} is a person who plans / coordinates your wedding. They pull together the logisitcs for your wedding day to ensure that no small detail is left out. As I call it: a wedding planner is your human equivalent to an insurance policy for the wedding - we make sure you've gotten all your ducks lined up and we make sure your ducks have no issues. A wedding planner is different to a wedding designer, so please make sure of which kind you'd like {naturally a planner can also be a designer and a designer can also be a planner} but for arguement's sake, we will keep them separate. A wedding designer is just that: they design the wedding. They are the visual creators of the wedding day - designing all the decor.

Why do you think you need a wedding planner? This is a question that oft goes overlooked because its 'trendy' to have a planner so everyone wants / needs to have one. If you are busy, indecisive, don't know where to start, don't know what you want to spend on each vendor, not creative, or want a helping hand in general, HIRE A WEDDING PLANNER! Your wedding planner will give you a path to follow throughout this process, negotiate contracts, educate you on every aspect of a wedding {pricing, advice, ideas, etiquette} and will give you the honest truth on what works and what doesn't work. In essence: your wedding planner is a one stop shop on how to get your wedding planned without the hassles. Who wouldn't want a professional team mate?

So before you start looking for a wedding planner, spend a moment writing why exactly you need one. Those needs are very important and will need to be communicated in your consultation.

Next week: Part 2: Researching a Wedding Planner

Fabulous Friday: Must Read Wedding Wisdom

We made it to Friday! Its been an incredible week, from meeting Sara Rue & Colin Cowie {we're on the same committee for a charity event in June} to making a committment to myself to stop putting everything first and me last and so I've started going back to the gym full time, to saying goodbye to a dear friend whose leaving NYC - its been a productive week!

Starting next week will be a new series on Consultations & Wedding Planner pricing - I hope you stop back to read my thoughts and comment as well!

To get you in the mood for pricing, check out these great posts on photographer pricing:

Melissa Jill, a talented photographer in Arizona wrote a great piece last week about why she doesn't discount pricing. Its insightful and I encourage you to read it.

Every Last Detail has a blunt but necessary post today on photography pricing expectations - sometimes you just have to keep it real.

The lovely Lisa Barr {@bridalease} has a fabulous series this week {1, 2 & 3}about Montreal, which really is a beautiful place & a great wedding destination!

And last but not least, Missy Photography posted images from a wedding we worked on last month - Congratulations Blair & Matt, you two really are the sweetest couple and I loved working with you both!

Destination Weddings

Very good friends of ours are getting married this weekend in Riviera Maya, Mexico ~ so once again we're off to celebrate their relationship and enjoy the sun! Before they got engaged, they knew that they would be having a destination wedding. One of their favorites things to do is travel and they wanted to incorporate that into their special day. After many trips around Mexico, the Caribbean and Florida, they chose the Fairmont Mayakoba.

For all of those interested in a destination wedding, here are some questions to think about before you chose your locale:

1. How easy is this destination for your guests to travel to?
2. Besides the costs that you'll spend on the wedding - what is the financial commitment that you're asking your guests to make?
3. What is your realistic guest list size? {And keep in mind that some guests may not be able to come for financial reasons - don't hold that against them}
4. What part of the year are you getting married? Make sure that your locale isn't meant to have hurricanes, high winds or other foul weather
5. Seriously seriously seriously consider hiring a wedding coordinator. Someone who knows the ins and outs of the logistics surrounding destination weddings and can take care of them for you. Destination weddings don't need to be a logistical nightmare but you want to ensure that your vendors {if local especially} have a very clear picture of what your vision is.
6. Make sure that you and your fiance have time and money to make a few trips to explore various places to have your wedding and after you've chosen your destination to finalize details and take care of things.

I would also suggest purchasing The Destination Wedding Planner by Alison Hotchkiss ~ its thoughtfully laid out and chock full of very valuable information!


We'll be here celebrating our friends wedding on Saturday!
{via bridalguide.com}

New Wedding Planning Resource

If you've been planning a wedding or just starting out in your wedding planning process, you're probably becoming an expert in Wedding Blogs and Wedding Resources. There are so many to find advice, ideas and inspiration that it can be quite overwhelming! But, there's a new resource that goes live on January 1st and its definitely worth checking out. Kate Parker, a fabulous planner in New Hampshire has built a wedding resource site that really is divine. Its got practical advice from wedding vendors, profiles of some of the best and more galleries and images than you could imagine. If you're in need of anything wedding related, check out myKPwedding on January 1st and be prepared to be wow'ed!

{Disclosure: Although I am a paying advertiser on myKPw, I received no financial compensation for this post nor was I asked by Kate Parker to write this post}

Defining Luxury

Today's post is directed towards you, dear reader. I am currently reading a book on Luxury and how through the age's the word alone has come to be defined. It's quite something to think about, especially when it comes to weddings. Years ago, luxury was thought of something that only the upper upper classes could afford. Luxury items and / or lifestyle was seen as only for the very rich and elite. These days, the word luxury has morphed into something much more. Luxury is not only the finest things in life {which are more accessible to the masses} but also experiences. Free time is now considered a luxury. Travel and amazing perks on your trip are now considered luxury.

How does Luxury play a role in your wedding? Is it the luxury of a budget that allows you to fulfill all your wedding day wishes? Is it the luxury of having the best of the best? Is it the luxury of having all your friends and family be there to celebrate your vows? Is it the luxury of knowing that you are going to say 'I Do' to your soulmate? Is it the luxury of knowing that your day will be smooth, seamless and amazing because of the fabulous vendors you've hired and the trust you have in them?

What are your luxuries in life and in wedding planning?

{Personal note: some of my luxuries in life include a healthy happy family, being able to travel and having a seriously comfy couch}