2009 Wedding Lessons Learned: Dealing with Debbie Downer

2009 Wedding Lessons Learned

As a wedding planner, one of my roles is to act as a neutral party on the wedding day - particularly between parents and the couple getting married. Most of the time, everyone is just so happy and full of love that there isn't any issues, sometimes however, this isn't the case and emotions get overwhelming and get the best of people. I know, as a bride, that its very difficult to shut out the negativity that you may receive from a family member, but honestly, you have to. You have to make a concerted effort to shut out words and thoughts that will upset you. Its your wedding day! Be happy and strong! Remember that who ever is lashing out is doing so because their emotions and thoughts are unstable - it almost never actually has anything to do with YOU. Its hard to do, but blocking out the negative will ensure that your day isn't a gloomy one.

I witnessed this at a wedding this year and it simply broke my heart. The mother of the bride was insistent that her daughter had planned the worst wedding ever {trust me, it was quite the opposite}. She stated this over and over to the point that her daughter became inconsolable and miserable. Her newly minted husband tried his hardest to bring her back up to enjoy the beautiful day, but he couldn't. I was devastated at everyones behavior and repeatedly tried to get everyone into neutral corners and to just let it all go. In the end, all the bride is going to remember is how her mother ruined her fabulous day. Please - don't let this happen to you. If you think or know that someone will try and be a downer on your day, tell your wedding planner so they know in advance to keep everyone apart. We can intervene and will intervene, but sometimes the damage is already done.

Seek out positivity on your day, and don't let any negativity bring you down - you're getting married!